Monthly Archives: September 2011

On Friends- 5mf

Having friends hasn’t always been so easy.  I moved around a lot as kid so I didn’t grow up with the same group of people.  I often wasn’t accepted at school because I wasn’t part of the “growing up together” friendship circles that existed.  I  had a few acquaintances that I talked to and hung out with, but not a soul friend that knew me through and through.  As an adult,  I had a few friendships that ended in disaster because I did too much, or they did too  little.  Or I picked the wrong kind of people.  I  had to be more deliberate and less needy to form some true friendships.  In the past 10 years I have carefully worked on being the kind of person that people would want to be friends with.  I stopped being clingy and needy, stopped trying too hard.  I was just there with all my quirks.  And eventually, my friends were there too.  Nowadays,  I have a few friends that know me through and through, that know my quirks and deep dark secrets, but love me anyway.  One of my friends even called me “sister”.  I cried when she said that to me.  Finally.  A true sister-friend.  Thank your Lord for true friends.  I Thank you Lord for the mamas-friends, the sister-friends, the brother-friends that I have now with good healthy connections.

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Last day of the Just Write! campaign- Marriage

Today is the last do of the Just Write! campaign hosted by Mary Kathryn Tyson at Beauty of Ashes.  The idea was to prompt us stuck creatives with a single word.  MK would give us a one word prompt (much like Gypsy Mamas five minute Friday) and were to write for 5 unedited minutes.  What has come out of this brain has been interesting.  For the last day of this campaign, I am going to use MK’s prompt but write for as long as I like.

Marriage

No one said coming together for a purpose was easy.  People coming together in a church, a friendship, a project, or a marriage requires some sense of “we” and less sense of “me”.  A sense of “we” means that one must put down one’s own ideas about how things should be.  Growing together is a messy business because we all want our way.  We want our ideas and needs to be higher than other’s ideas and needs.  We want to be first and noticed and to get the credit.  This is because people are inherently selfish.

One of Jesus’ great commands was to “love one another as I have loved you” (John 13:34).  Jesus is the perfect example of what it means to be in unity with another person.  He shares the responsibilities of the Godhead with the Holy Spirit and the Father.  He did not put what he wanted first in his ministry and said “Very truly I tell you, the Son can do nothing by himself; he can do only what he sees his Father doing, because whatever the Father does the Son also does.” (John 5:19).  Jesus did what was best for the team and for the recipients of his ministry.

Marriage is really no different.  Two people coming together for the purpose of becoming one requires a lot of effort.  Whether or not a marriage can survive this process depends on the attitudes of each person going into the relationship.  Some people think of marriage as a agreement to live as separate entities with separate lives.  While others think of marriage as being completely enmeshed in the other person.  Either model produces unnecessary pain and suffering.  And the pain becomes the focal point out which all interactions occur.  Marriages tend to polarize when people become stuck in their views of the person.  People forget why they got together in the first place.  This is because marriage and partnership involves grafting and blending.

God intends for marriage to be a grafting process that blends together to separate and unique individuals.  Jesus says that when we accept him as our savior, we are grafted into the vine that is God.  Grafting involves cutting from one tree a cultivar, and cutting the host tree for a place to put the cultivar.  This sounds a bit unpleasant.  The beginning of a marriage, that is after the honeymoon, can be messy when one is confronted with all the realities of this other person.  Yet, there is hope.

When a portion of one fruit tree is grafted into another fruit tree, a new species or variety of fruit is produced.  The fruit of a well blended marriage is beautiful to behold.  There is something special about a couple that weathered the worst of the grafting process.  They look at each other with true friendship and love in their eyes.  Their children exemplify the love that exists between.  And most importantly, God is glorified.

Lord, make my marriage a beautiful

Day 11 of Just Write!- Wedding

If  you have been following this at all, you know the drill about what I am doing.  If not, click here.

Wedding

I was lying in bed thinking about my wedding day.  I had asked the Lord for a perfect day, and I got one.  My husband-to-be insisted that our ceremony take place outdoors in a place special to him.  Questions about the weather came up “What if it rains?” was the biggest one of all.  I fussed about this for awhile.  Then I prayed and asked the Lord for a perfect day.  He told me it would be perfect. This was several months before our April wedding, so I had to take this on faith.  My groom also took this on faith.  People would ask me about wedding plans, I would tell them and the inevitable question would come “What if it rains?”.  I would say, “I already know the weather report, it’s gonna be sunny, 70 and a little bit breezy.”  There were many times over the months till our wedding day that I wondered if I had heard wrong, and what would I do if it did rain?  Yet, something inside of stubbornly clung to the weather report for that day.  The eve of my wedding was fraught with anxiety about all sorts of things, but not the weather.  It might have crossed  my mind a couple of times, but I fretted more about a good night’s sleep and who was coming to the wedding than I did about the weather.  The morning of the wedding the sky was clear and bright blue.  As the sun rose in the sky, the temperature rose to about 70 degrees and there was a little breeze gusting gently around the waiting guests.  It was a perfect day.

Day 10 of Just Write!- Ugly

If  you have been following this at all, you know the drill about what I am doing.  If not, click here.

Ugly

I’ve heard people say “God don’t make ugly”.  Which is supposed to be a comfort to those who feel bad about themselves.  I’ve also heard “God don’t like ugly”.  Which is supposed to be an admonishment for people who are behaving in an ugly.  Some of us out here feel ugly no matter what.  Both of those phrases can feel either like a lie or a condemnation.  It is not difficult to believe that God did not make me ugly.  It is easy to believe that Satan has perverted God’s creation (like h e always does).  Of course God doesn’t “make” anything ugly.  Satan makes things ugly.  Then he tells us that God doesn’t like us with his lies.  It’s just not true folks, God loves those that are ugly, and likes them too.  Otherwise, what was the point of Jesus’ life and death?  Jesus himself said that only the sick need a doctor, those that are will do not need a doctor.  Please Lord, help me to move past the ugly that I perceive (real or not) and to find the beauty that is there.

Push past the pain

On Gypsy Mama’s blogsite she says, “We write bold and beautiful and free. Unscripted and unedited. We just write without worrying if it’s just write or not.”

I don’t think I can say that any better.  If you want to join in you can write your own and link up at her website.

Okay here goes…

Growing

Growing causes pain.  Pain causes suffering.  Or pain causes growth.  This all depend on how you look at it.  I am sure that the tender new plants pushing their tiny new leaves towards the sun would feel pain, if plants could feel pain.  Pushing against the soil, the rocks, the clinging and wet mud, causes one to push back.  Anyone who has ever exercised or spent a day helping a friend move understands the pain that using muscles creates.  New muscle fiber is formed in the valleys created by old muscle being torn when used for a little more than the muscle can handle.  But, unless the old muscle makes way and splits from itself, the new muscle has no room to grow.  So, the pain of tearing and rending causes new growth.  New growth means something greater will be accomplished than what could be accomplished in the old state.  So, push and strain against the pain and encounter new growth.  Allow your muscle fibers to tear a bit and be filled in with new growth.

Day 8 and Day 9 of Just Write!

Yesterday was kind of a fog of recovering from the weekend + Monday, and some kind of little stomach bug.  So I never got around to doing the post.  I actually miss not writing, so this experiment must be working!  So I am going to write yesterday’s and today’s in this post.

One

One day I will see you again

One day I will be forever yours

One day I will look on your face and feel bliss

One day I will no longer be worried, or frustrated, or angry, or sad, or in pain

One day LOVE will wrap me up in warmth, and comfort, and peace

One day earthly concerns will no longer matter

One day my prayers will be answered

One day I will understand it all

One day it will be you and me and everyone else

One day the mysteries of the universe will unfold themselves to me

One day Jesus will be my bride(groom)

One day the Holy Spirit will no longer be invisible to my naked eye

One day EVIL will be vanquished forever and ever

One day (and already know) I will be in eternity where there is no beginning and no end

One day I will receive the crowns that are mine

One day I will touch the center of the universe

One day I will be filled with joy unending

One day the struggle will cease

One day I will have a job in heaven that is perfectly suited to me

One day I will be with you, and you will be with me.

Peace

Peace that passes all understanding seems so far away from me.  I struggle, I fight, I yearn, and I bleed.  Yet, God promises these things to me.  They are mine for the taking, if only I would reach out my hand and take them.  I understand this with my head, but not necessarily with my heart.  Some days it seems that I like the struggle and bleeding more than I like the peace.  Perhaps the fighting gives me a sense of power.  Perhaps bleeding shows I am alive.  I don’t know, but most of the time I would like to be at peace.  With people like me, sometimes being at peace means being dead, because peace eludes us so easily.  However, I have work to do on this earth before I die, so dying must wait a while.  I’ll go when it is  my time, and not before.  Oh Lord, show me how to reach out and grab peace like a climber grabs a rope to get back up the mountain after a scary plunge from the sheer cliff.  Help me not to squander your gift for me.  Help me to surrender to your ways and your peace in this lifetime.  Help me to know when to pick up my sword, and when to lay it down and rest.  Help me to know true peace that passes all understanding. Help me to know this before death takes me to you.

Eyes- Day 7 of the Just Write! campaign

If  you have been following this at all, you know the drill about what I am doing.  If not, click here.

I  skipped day 6 last Thursday because I was in the hospital with a kidney stone.  I actually missed not writing Thursday (despite the tremendous physical pain) and not writing the 5mf on Friday.  I am taking that as a good sign.

So today’s word is Eyes.

Eyes

Your eyes see me and all that I am.

You are not satisfied to let me stay where I am.

Your eyes look at your creation and say “It is good”.

But, you are not satisfied to leave things tarnished and undone.

Your eyes see my hidden and dark places despite my efforts to hide and shelter my pain.

You are not satisfied to let the darkness rule  my being.

Your eyes see the potential I have despite the sin in my life.

And you are not satisfied to let me leave  my gifts on the floor untouched.

Your eyes see my beginning and my end.

Your are satisfied to water, nurture, and give sunlight to the time in the middle.

You are satisfied to make me a priority and to help me flourish.

You are satisfied to help me be more like Jesus more and more everyday.

Because your eyes see me and all that I am.

Bible Study

I am visiting Beauty for Ashes today for our bible study of Romans.

Fun!- Day 5 of the Just Write! campaign

If  you have been following this at all, you know the drill about what I am doing.  If not, click here.

So today’s word is Fun.  But I decided it needed an exclamation point so now it’s Fun!

(I think I am gonna throw off the 5 minute time restraint a little.  Because it’s more fun!)

Fun!

I like to do things that make me giggle with delight.  I like to be around people that make me giggle with delight.  I guess I like giggling with delight.  Full on belly laughs are good too.  My husband and I try really hard to have fun in our little family.  We sing silly songs, make up silly games, tell silly jokes, have tickle fights (which are all one-sided because my husband is not ticklish.  NOT FAIR!), and try to outdo each other with goofiness and silliness…and that is just the two of us.  Our 6 year old joins in our silliness and fun and adds his own brand of humor.  I am always happy to do things with friends that are fun.  And sometimes I am surprised at how much fun I had when trying something new.  I recently got to go shopping with a very good friend of mine and her teenage daughter.  I love them both so dearly, so naturally we just have fun together.  But, this shopping trip was extra fun for me because it’s something I rarely do.  And, we always celebrate birthdays together (the daughter’s birthday is on my birthday, and the mom’s is the day after), so this year we went to shopping on Main Street in our college town.  We looked at stuff, giggled at silly sayings on wall plaques and cards, ate too much goodies, and enjoyed each other’s company.

The best thing about fun is that afterwards my heart feels full of life and spirit.  It’s hard to be grumpy and cranky when one is having fun.  The ability to laugh is one of God’s greatest gifts, no?  I mean, why else would Proverbs 17 :22 say ” A merry heart doeth good like a medicine: but a broken spirit drieth the bone.” (KJV).

So go out and have some Fun! people!

Joy- Day 4 of the Just Write! campaign

Welcome to day 4 of the Just Write! campaign here at Beauty in it’s time.  Mary Kathryn Tyson is hosting this campaign in an effort to get her creative juices flowing, and other people’s as well.  I have chosen to participate because I need a kick in the rear to get myself writing more frequently.  So,everyday that she does this she will give us a one-word prompt and we “JustWrite!” for five minutes without editing (note: editing for grammar errors is okay, just don’t do a total rewrite). We are not trying to craft masterpieces here, we are attempting to “Just Write!” and get the creative juices flowing. MK has offered to allow us to write in her comments section, or to put a link in her comments if we have our own blog to write in.

Joy

Weeping may endure for a night, but joy comes in the morning.  So, weeping is okay, but a promise of joy comes after the weeping.  Joy is a promise, an eternal promise.  We do not have to earn joy, it is just ours for the taking.  Joy is a state of mind that can last through the days, weeks, months, and years.  Joy has very little to do with happiness.  Happiness is like the wind, it comes quickly and recedes just as readily.  Joy can withstand the ups and downs of life.  Joy is about trust.  Trusting God that He has got it all covered.  Trusting that there is nothing to worry about.  Trusting that “all things work together for the good of those who LOVE the Lord.”  Joy is not dependent on happiness to exist.  Otherwise, we could not trust God’s promise of joy.  But we can trust God’s promises, because, well, because HE is GOD.  Thank you Jesus for making  my joy complete, even when I cannot feel it.